happy holidays???

so i'm amazed at the prices of things.
1 manicure = $15
a mani/pedi = $40
1 venti drink from starbucks = $6

we're doing a needs drive at work
del-monte canned goods are on sale at Kroger for .49 cents a can
5lb bags of flour for $2
3lb bags of sugar for $2

I just spent $11 and got 12 rolls of toilet paper, 6 bars of Ivory Soap, 2 tubes of toothpaste, 1 bag of flour.

sigh....even I fail and fall into the trap of consumerism and forget that there are some things that are luxuries to others, like having toilet paper and soap. the lady infront of me at the grocery store swiped her card and couldn't buy the toilet paper she needed. talk about being humbled. needless to say, no starbucks or happy hour at sonic for me this month.

summer trips

it's been quite hectic lately. well it is summer and that's expected in the world of teenagers. the summer sex series for the senior high went lovely. as did flocking and welcoming our new senior pastor.
now to move on to starting up our new junior high confirmation and the narrative of Jesus for the fall.
here are some pictures from our mission trip.

degrading & demeaning pop-culture

being of the world and being of the church are two different things. being transformed by the renewing of our spirit is different than conforming to the world...that said

tuesday i was accessories browsing w/ my good friend april and we entered a popular teen accessories store in hopes of finding a headband for me to wear in my wedding. at the front of the store, next to the register, about rib height there was a shelf of flasks. they were lepoard print, glittered and one read "biatch" in pink glittery lettering. There was also a disclaimer that read "we do not support or condone underage drinking"

LIKE HELL YOU DON'T. a store who's target market is between the ages of 7-16, that sells flasks.

on a local radio morning show they were talking about how this popular and over priced store was being sued because their sister tween store was marketing a padded push up bikini top. this store is primarily marketed to tweens (ranging again from 8-12). this is insane.

then for the billionth time i heard riahanna's s&m on the radio AND my students were talking about it at church.

thank you pop culture and how you are trying to turn all of our children into sexualized drunks by the time they can drive....

after i retire to my couch to read my mail...i opened my designer underwear catalog to see if they have any sweet sales...i notice their teen line and the sleepwear. surprisingly it's appropriate. sleep shirts, tank tops and sleep shorts.
EXCEPT for the writing.
"let's get naked", "get naked with me", "stay the night" amongst other things....

we (respectable people...) are fighting a losing battle with culture. our world at this rate will turn into the whores of Babylon all over again.

my mom used to tell me i looked like a hussy if i wore tank tops or showed my shoulders in general. i used to roll my eyes at her, as i am sure kids do now a days when we mention they should not wear shorts that are so short the pockets are hanging out the bottoms or if they have something vulgar written across their chest.
i am perfectly sure that at least some of the girls that are wearing these...messages are not fully aware of the impact they have.
much like i am sure that our kids are not aware that when they watch trash like jersey shore or teen mom that they are becoming immune to the culture and are starting to think of it as 'normal'

....i wish pushing the limit and reaching for shock value were not the norms.
I wish we could just all be respectable people encouraging the building up of people and the spirit of God.

...it's a uphill battle and i've got my gloves ready.

the arrogance of authority: power in the church

man it's been awhile since i've posted. we've been wrapping up the semester for seminary and of course there's planning stuff for spring break and having meetings with parents for the summer mission trip.
march >me, my assignments have been lack luster, i've had 4-5 special (as in something other than regular wed/sun worship) events in march...on top of spring sports starting (soccer, tennis, parlay team)
I plan on taking a vacay after Holy Week....sometime adam and i will be planning our wedding (that's so weird to say)

i wrote this for an assignment for class, but i'm finding that i need to remind myself of this....

There are a lot of times in youth ministry where we as the youth minister, especially those of us who are in our first few years of ministry, think that we must be able to plan and execute every event, meeting, retreat, and fundraiser our selves and that we are the only ones that can can get anything done properly. Well after all we have been to many conventions, workshops and some of us have degrees or some form of training. By all means this means we are the only people that can make ministry happen. Only us youth ministers can make ministry happen, why after all it's a divine calling.

I am reminded of an e-mail a parent sent me, intended to brighten my day, when instead it brought much insight to my life:

A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas and talked with an old rancher.

He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs."

The rancher said, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there.....", as he pointed out the location.

The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me !"

Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.

"See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land !!

No questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself clear......do you understand ?!!"

The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......

With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.

The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs.....

"Your badge, show him your BADGE........ ! !"

Yes, yes, we all get a laugh, but a lot of times youth ministry is a lot like this. How many times have we responded in a less than Christian way to other members/committees in the churches we work in after we have been told no to a submitted request? What do you mean we can't take bus there? What do you mean we can't attend that church camp? Do you know who I am?I am the youth minister and I will take the church bus and the kids where I know is best for them. Who are you? You're just a chair on the finance committee, do you even know what summer camp is?

After all I have had training and I am in seminary. I should know what is best.

Before our arrogant outburst we didn't think to ask if the bus had recently had an oil change, if the compressor was working, if another group had reserved it first. We didn't think to ask people who had been in the church longer than we have if our church had been banned from the summer camp due to inappropriate exposure from previous years.

There are legitimate reasons for no. It's not that anyone is stepping on the lowly youth minister, it's not that the people of the church think they know better than we do, sometimes they genuinely do. There become times where we as youth ministers over- accredit ourselves and ministry becomes about what we as the minister want instead of what the ministry needs. We get so emerged in our role, so engulfed in the power of making decisions for others that we lose sight of ministry.

After reading Henry Nowen's book, In the Name of Jesus, I began to realize, yes, to some people it may mean something great that you have attended the national youth worker's convention for the past 24 years and that you have graduated from the top seminary in the nation with a 4.0, but none of that matters if you are not working on your own spirituality.

When we spend time worrying about "selling ourselves" with our earthly accomplishments in ministry instead of sharing with God in ministry we put ourselves and our desires above God's. We forget, or push aside our own spiritual well-being.

Nowen has reminded me that it is God who heals the broken, and not Lauren. It is Lauren that needs God and not the other way around.The church and the youth ministry will still survive with or without me.

Youth Ministry will continue without Lauren, so I need to stop being so full of myself, because just when I feel like I have accomplished a lot, just when I think I have something else to add to my resume, I think of the ONE who accomplished the ultimate sacrifice, who fulfilled the ultimate goal, the ONE who took on our burdens and sins. Christ is the one who should be lifted up and glorified, not me

a destroyed love: the damages of divorce

i have come to realize that i have been blessed with the spiritual gift of being emotionally balanced. maybe this is a poor way to word this...
this term in seminary we are learning about trauma and crisis counseling. we are learning the rights we have as pastors (legally) and learning how to deal with these situations.

recently i have had a very dear friend come to me. they have discovered that their spouse has been cheating on them for the duration of their marriage. the spouse has put themselves into counseling and my friend is distraught and utterly devastated. the friend's mom instantly suggested that my friend come to see me. i too am shocked and don't know what to do other than to be there.

i guess sometimes that's all you can really do, is to be there.
however this is a difficult situation. most of the time my students that are going through a difficult time may question God...which is better than denying God exists at all. or denying that there is a superior being looking out and caring for their well being.

the difficulty here with my friend and their spouse is that neither are believers.

i don't believe in divorce, however...this has been a re-occurring behavior. i am not in this friend's shoes but i don't think i would have ended up in this situation. i would have dismissed this opportunity to love if i did not trust or if there was ever speculation of dishonesty.

i understand the spouse is undergoing counseling for this destructive behavior but i think in this situation divorce may be necessary for both parties involved.

sigh....the struggles of life.

the calling

working for a church i am all to familiar about preaching about people discerning their call. answering God's call for their life, urging them to serve, love and be of service.

never in my life have i been more sure that i am doing exactly what God has called me to do. the passion burns deeply. the love. the joy. the fulfillment. the completeness. the feeling of devoted service.

i.love.youth.ministry.
whatever happened to that fashion degree of mine?

new semester

man this semester is starting off with a pow! i thought for sure since i had completed the reading prior to the intensive and that since i had planned out the year's activities for the students in advance that FOR SURE this year would be less stressful....NOT the case.

i found out today via fb that one of the guys that used to play ball in the gym i formerly managed passed away. he was 17.

i feel overwhelmed by a few of the assignments and the tasks ahead of me in the process of repairing the youth group at the current church i am serving.

may the grace of God consume me.