the failing economy; the failing church

so this sunday after 10:50 service my boss calls me into his office w/ the head of sprc. i've been laid off. they cannot afford to pay a full-time person. the numbers just are not there.
forget i just graduated 3/4 of my youth group whom may i add were not of the character or set the mood of the youth group they needed to.

so i re work the group. i get students that had left b/c of the lude behavior to not only come back but to bring friends. youth group is fun again. we have games, no foul language, no homo jokes, no talk of sex or drugs. no yelling or disrespecting....
i have a new middle school ministry w/ even more parents involved and a praise team.

'lauren you've started moving us in the right direction. thank you for getting the parents involved, it's just what we needed.'
'we just cannot afford to pay someone full time. we'll be completely run by parents and volunteers.'

not gonna lie. i'm upset. i was willing to put in the extra elbow. this job has been an uphill battle but i put on my holy armor and was willing to work for it.
...realistically though we've lost 12+ members of our congregation to death (old age) and have only gained 1 family of 4 that comes half the time and about 2 other families.

sadly as much as i still love that church it's dying and will be consolidated.
any church that doesn't support the children is going to not thrive=going to die.

sadly it's also at my expense....they're paying me 2 months severance though. my last day is june 9th.
adam's fam is really supportive. i have not dared to tell mine yet. they told me i would fail before i began. i haven't decided if it's going to suck more to tell my mom and dad or my kids.
....oooh man.
my sweet sweet girls and reid, what am i going to do.